For the Birds

March 30, 2014

The Dan and Deanne Jacobs family now has two more members.  They are feathered.  They are colorful.  They are scared out of their minds.  They are parakeets. 

 Their names have changed so many times in the last 72 hours that I cannot say for certain what they will be called.  We are currently calling one of them Skittles and the other one is still being debated.  Tut and Olaf have both been tossed around as possible monikers. Any suggestions for the other bird are welcome.  He is blue.  The boys are already a bit disappointed that they have not been able to teach them to talk yet.  I was surprised to find out that Parakeets are the best mimics of any in the bird family.  Some of them can have vacabularies well into the thousands.  Who knew?  I am scared to think of the words they might learn around here.  Especially if they learn Trev-speak.  I don't know if I could handle another unitelligble language coming from a bird or otherwise.

Our pretty willow tree in the front yard is now mulch at the dump.  A snow storm split it in two this winter and from the split it was evident to see that it was infested with worms.  So we chopped the rest of it up this week.  We now have a largish stump in the front yard.  Too bad I am no sort of a sculptor.  We are now in the market for a couple of good hearty trees that aren't willows or aspens.  Suggestions would be appreciated.

Did I mention soccer?  There is a lot of it going on around here.  Tate played in his first game and true to his prognostications, he dominiated.  He scored 3 times in as many minutes and then was relegated to goalie duty.  It helps to be the oldest and largest at this age.  The same cannot be said when you get past your 30's.  There is no advantage to being larger and older than my current competition in basketball.

Deanne happily volunteered me to watch our neighbors children while she went to the women's conference last night.  I had 8 kids for about 3 and a half hours. 

 My favorite part was when their 18 month old decided that he had had it with me and cried (screamed is a better word) for the last 45 minutes. Deanne had a wonderful time though, and I am glad that she was able to take a break and get out to that meeting with her mom and sister.  While they were out the missionaries stopped by.  I had them come in and we talked to them for a bit.  I then asked if they would share a quick thought and testimony with the kids, which they graciously did.  I was impressed with their spirit and vibrancy.  I was grateful that they would take some time to bear testimony to my children.  I know that they impressed the kids, as they were all riveted.  Even Trev.

Shane blessed his baby, Micah, today.  I was impressed with the spirit I felt in the blessing itself and in the testimony meeting afterwards. I was especially touched by his words that counseled his son to lean on those who leaned on the Lord. I am grateful to those who share and express their testimonies of faith.  I need that in my life right now (actually I always need that) and I am hungry for expressions of faith and hope.

I was thinking of my brother in law Kevin a lot during the meeting.  I would like him to know that we combined our fast, prayers and faith with his and the entire family, in hope for a good outcome for his recent illness.  I know that his prognosis is good and I feel confident all will be well.

We were sorry to hear about Kathryn and Kent's non-cruise fiasco.  I can't imagine how frustrating it would be to travel that far expecting you would shortly be on vacation only to be turned away due to events out of their control.  If nothing else, it will make for a good story in the years to come and now you have a better knowledge of what Galviston TX looks like...

Love to all from the Jacobs.

Dan

March Madness!!

March 24, 2014

All,

Our madness has nothing to do with basketball.  We have the soccer induced insanity around these parts.  This was a successful soccer weekend for all of our boys.  Tracen especially had a good weekend wherein his team both won and he scored 4 goals.  Two of his goals came right off of the ol' noggin as well and were particularly exciting to see.  I am really excited to see how Tyler and Tate will do as they will both start having games this week as well.

So I filled out one NCAA tournament bracket this year.  Just one.  I did not enter it into any contests or put any money down and it would appear that this is a good thing.  I think that I have two teams left out of all my picks.  I am notoriously bad at guessing the outcomes of sporting events.  I know that Warren Buffet offered 1 billion dollars to the person who filled out the perfect bracket... it looks like his $ is safe for this year and probably for any year that he decides to do this offer. 

Our Lester Leprachaun did make it (barely) to our house!!  We love this holiday and love traditions!

So our entire family was part of that musical program depicting the Willie and Martin handcart companies.  Deanne's parents and grandparents were there along with Leah this time.  I think that everyone in attendance was touched by the spirit.  It is inspiring to feel of the pioneer dedication to the cause of the Gospel and Zion.  There are still lessons to be learned from their experiences.  Our boys did a fine job and really seemed to enjoy their first little foray into the acting world, Tracen especially.  Perhaps the Jacobs will yet produce another generation of thespians.

Deanne's parents took us all skiing this weekend.  All of us but Trev that is.  He stayed back with Leah and Joel (thanks guys).  All of the boys did very well, especially Tate who for his third time skiing, really surprised me.  I don't know if I will ever be able to afford to take the kids up skiing as much as I would like to, but I am glad that they are at least getting the experience a couple of times per year.  Many thanks to Keith and Janelle for making this happen.

I was shocked and saddened to hear of one of my dear friends struggle with his testimony this week.  It would appear that in his attempt to answer the questions of one his co-workers about some of the sensitive early church historical events and circumstances, that he read some anti-LDS literature that sent him reeling.  He and I had a very heart-felt and tender conversation about faith and hope.  Through my tears and sorrow for his aching heart I bore a simple testimony of Christ.  I told him that I believe in our Redeemer.  I expressed my belief in trying to pattern our lives after Him.  I told him that I have hope that there is a life after this that is made possible through Him.  Our conversation seemed to lift his spirits a bit, though I am certain that he has some work yet to do on his testimony.

I don't claim to have even a fraction of the answers to his many sensitive questions, other than simple faith-based ones.  Ultimately, I accept that my faith and hope will have to be enough of an answer for the time being.  I realize that there is nothing scientific about this, and for me that's ok.  I may never have all of the scientific, historical, or archaeological evidence to prove my faith, but if I did, then it wouldn't really be faith then would it?  I have a testimony borne of hundreds of simple spiritual experiences over the course of my lifetime.  I have had truth whispered to my heart time and time again.  I can feel it now as I write this.  I choose to stay the course of my faith in spite of the logic of men.  Does this make me weak?  In the eyes of men it may, but I am less concerned about what men may think of me then what my God thinks of me.  At some point in this life I hope that I can replace my faith with knowledge.  I pray for that time, but even if I never attain it in this life, I will continue on my imperfect path back to my real home.  I pray that my loved ones will follow, allow me to lean on them, and in my weaker moments, carry me there.  This is my belief, my hope and my simple testimony.  I love you.

Dan and Dee

Bicycle Poetry in Motion

March 16, 2014

This is the time of year when soccer takes over our lives.  Between 3 boys in soccer, their practices, and their games, every day of the week is now blessed with soccer something or other.  Not that soccer doesn't encroach on our lives anyway.  Tracen all but has a ball sewed to his foot at all times.  I have semi-seriously threatened to pop all soccer balls in the house as they always seem to be underfoot.

              

Tracen's team scrimmaged against an older girls squad on Tuesday.  They may have won the game and Tracen may have had an amazing bicycle kick for a goal during that match, but the girls punished them physically for it.  A couple of the slide tackles against the boys were down right mean, one in particular where Tracen seemed to skid on his forehead for a few meters.  Tracen said the pain was worth it just so he could fulfill his long-time wish of scoring the goal from a bicycle kick.  That goal was particularly cool-looking.  I had a proud dad moment when all of the other parents were saying "Did you just see that?"  "That was the coolest goal I have ever seen!" and the like.

Tyler and Tate have also started their soccer campaigns and they are both excited for their games this week.  Tate in particular is excited as he has noticed that he is the biggest kid on his team, which to him will obviously translate into pitch domination.  I have tried to advise him not to count his goals before they are in the net, but he will not be swayed.  This is Tate after all.

Tracen memorized his Lewis Carrol poem  and was the first person to pass it off in his class.  I was impressed with his ability to not only memorize, but put some real infection into his voice when he recited it.  I think that he really enjoyed how silly and random the poem is, not to mention the cadence and meter of it.

Tate had his first brush with the principal the other day.  It turns out that he and another boy got into an argument over whether the road (as in the pavement) is clean or not.  Even though Tate was on the right side of the argument, he was in the wrong to press the issue to the point of yelling.  There was nothing physical about the encounter, but I guess, according to my other boys, there is a no-nonsense ground duty who marched their obstinant quarreling behinds straight to the principal's office.  There was nothing really more that came of it other than Dee and I talking to Tate about arguing and that he needed to find a better subject to argue if he was willing to go to the principal's office over it.

Deanne and I went out with several other couples in our ward this Friday.  We went downtown to an Italian restraunt by the name of Bucca Di Beppos.  We were situated in the "Pope's" room.  The theme was very Papal including a huge bust of Pope John Paul with his hands clasped in a papal blessing over our food right in the middle of the table.  It was a fun night in spite of the creepy Pope staring me down as I slurped up my spaghetti.

Dee has spent the last couple of Saturday's participating in Girl's night out activities.  Last night's event must have been particularly epic as she crawled into bed at 2:30 this morning.  I might be a bit concerned, but she was with other ladies in her Relief Society presidency.  

We hope that Adam had a nice baptism.  We wish we could have been there, but we are grateful that Dad sent pictures of the event.  Happy St Patrick's Day everyone.  We are certain that "Lester"  (our Leprechaun) will pull off some annoying stunt again this year.

Dan and Dee

Sock Monster...

March 2, 2014

I hate socks.  Allow me to clarify.  I hate my kids socks.  They wear them when they shouldn't (taking stuff to the outside garbage in the rain), don't wear them when they should (with shoes) and they leave them all over the house.  I am looking across the floor and I currently can count 3 pairs of socks haphazardly strewn about the couch and floor.  When they do take them off, they forget where they left them and then go and put on a new pair to soil.  This can happen upwards of several times per day.  I know that my sock plight is shared with pretty much every other parent on the planet, but that affords me no comfort.  I wish we could go back to the day when kids went barefoot for 9 months out of the year... actually, no I don't.  Tracen has recently developed feet that smell like road-kill.  Sometimes the only way to knock down the scent is by insisting he put on shoes.  

Tracen's indoor soccer team celebrated a near-win yesterday.  They played one of the top teams in their league and lost 2-3.  They have come a long way as a team.  There were some definite signs of improvement.  They were given no chance of hanging with these kids but just about pulled off a tie.  Thank you so much to Janelle and Dad (Leo) for coming to his game.  He really loves to have them come.

Speaking of sports, I am playing church ball this year.  We are undefeated and are in the semi-finals for region.  Deanne and the kids have come to a few of my games and it has been fun to see Tracen take an interest in his old man's sporting endeavors.  I have noticed that after the games he does a little scouting report on my efforts similar to what I do for him after his.  I guess it is just desserts.

Yesterday we went as a family to see the Lego Movie.  We were very entertained.  I appreciated the humor but I have a feeling if I had been a bit more of a Lego fan growing up that I would have enjoyed the movie even that much more.  I liked lego's well enough, but I was never one to sit down and create anything beyond what the instructions taught me to build (I was not what the movie referred to as a "Master Builder", more like "Mr. Business").  Perhaps that is why I never was very interested in architecture or engineering.  I was hopeful that after the show the kids would immediately want to go and pull out their legos and get to creating... they didn't.

Dee and I went to see Shane and Kenzie's baby, Micah, this week.  He is a handsome young lad.  It was very nice to be able to sit and talk with them in that quiet setting.  When we are all together as a part of the huge group, it is often so chaotic that we have little time to be able to visit.  I really enjoyed the hour we had with them.  They are in for a ride!  A good ride, but one that I don't envy, and one that I am glad we are mostly past at this point.  Good luck kids!  I see more and more why my eldest sister Kim was so keen on watching us enter the child rearing years, you can never really get an appreciation for parenting until you have experienced it for yourself.

Tracen completed his Science Fair project and was given the 3rd highest score for his entire grade at school.  Deanne did help him design his tri-fold and I spent an hour or two cutting out labels for his display, but for the most part it was not the nightmare I was concerned it would be.  I guess that this year is just to get them prepared for the REAL project that they will do next year in the 6th grade.  Tracen enjoyed working on the project and I was impressed with his level of self-motivation.  Deanne and I didn't have to ride him too hard to get working on it or have to produce it by ourselves - thank you Trace!   I wouldn't say that we have a budding scientist on our hands just yet, but it was nice to see him take some interest.

Deanne had the last of her vein procedures done.  Though we have been assured she will be sporting some nice gams in the future, currently they look like someone took batting practice on them.I don't think, I KNOW that Dee has a much higher pain tolerance than I do.  Other than her first night when she nearly fainted, she has hardly had any complaint and I think that she will be very happy with the results in time.

We hope all are doing well.  We are happy for Bruce and Christy in that they are getting their basement finished.  It looks like they have the framing done now. Nice.  I would also like to wish Dr. Suess  a happy Faffyfifflefimp (my attempt at "Suessing") of a birthday.  Thanks for all the wonderful nonsense you brought into the world.

Dan and Dee

Of Shoes, and ships, and Ceiling Wax...

February 23, 2014

All,

Tracen has been tasked with memorizing the entire Lewis Carrol poem "The Walrus and the Carpenter" for school.  This poem stretches well beyond the small snippets you get while watching Alice in Wonderland.  Speaking of Tracen and academia, he is also in the middle of his science fair project.  He is doing an experiment involving fruit preservation.  I am glad to say that is was 90% his idea and that it has taken minimal parental involvement up to this point.  I am certain that some student will have their parent assist them in building a cold-fusion reactor and get the blue ribbon, but as for me, I am just glad that Tracen is showing an interest in his project and completing it on his own thus far.

Tracen and Tyler had their blue and gold banquet this week.  They both received several awards including the Thomas S. Monson award. I was glad that they wanted to get this once-in-a-lifetime award.  They both took it pretty seriously and seemed genuinely interested in attaining the award.  They had one set of great-grandparents and both sets of grandparents attend the event.  We had your typical Blue and Gold fare along with the white cake with too much blue and gold frosting (I have always loved the frosting part) Thanks to Ben and Eric for talking to them about the merits of Scouting and carrying on after Cub Scouts which was the last requirement they needed for the award.

Trev gave the scripture in Primary today.  You would think that it would be something simple like "Jesus wept" or "We dwelt in a tent" or something easy for a Sunbeamer... not so!  He gave 2nd Nephi chapter 9 vs 13.  It has such un-sunbeamlike words as "incorruptible" and "immortal" and is slightly over 100 words long.  To his credit, he went up there and dutifully repeated the whole thing as it was whispered in his ear.  I think that I understood about 6% of the words he spoke.  It seemed to take about 30 minutes to get through it.

The boys have been soaking up the good weather over the last week.  Tracen and his friends have especially been taking advantage of the warm weather and snow-free yards.  They are constantly playing basketball, football, soccer or a mash-up of the three sports at all times outside.  I am very glad to see that they can entertain themselves beyond the sphere of electronics.  It is good that Tracen has about 10 kids his age to choose from within a stone's throw from our front doorstep.

Our family has been asked to be a part of a short musical representing some of the stories from the Willey and Martin handcart company.  Deanne gets to have a speaking part and sing a duet with me.  She is Eliza Gadd in the play.  She represents an English woman who initally opted to not join the church but followed her husband and children on their trek to Zion.  Well along the way she lost 4 of her 7 children, and her husband.  On a night a few days after her husband passed, she had a vision of him returning to her and encouraging her to persevere.  The duet that Dee and I sing is a representation of that documented experience and is VERY emotional.  More often than not in our practices the song and message reduce both Deanne and I to tears as we sing it. As mentioned, all of our boys also have a small part in the play as well. This production is being put on in preparation for our stake participating in Trek this year.

I have been reading the biography of my great-great Uncle Heaton Lunt.  It reads like a pretty incredible western.  This guy was a Mormon mountain cowboy from about 100 years ago.  It is hard to imagine that the world was so incredibly different a scant 100 years ago.  I also wonder how it is that we can be related.  This guy basically lived his life camping, hunting, horse riding and doing all manner of outdoorsy living.  I am not sure that he would claim me as kin if he were around today.  I feel incredibly soft, priviledged and sheltered as I read his life story.  I guess that is because I am incredibly soft, priviledged and sheltered.

Dee had some of her vericose veins removed and closed this week.  It looked to be pretty uncomfortable.

 As she unwrapped the bandage from her leg on Friday night, I guess she had been holding her breath, and she just about passed out.  That is a pretty helpless feeling when you see your spouse on the verge of fainting.  What are you supposed to do?  Find a pillow for them to faint on?  Tell them to snap out of it?  I will tell you what I did.   I sat there and kept asking her if she was going to pass-out.  It turns out that this is a very annoying question to ask someone on the verge of passing out.  It tuns out that they don't want to talk about it much.  So if someone you know is looking like they are going to pass out, just hang around in case they do.  At that point you can yell out "give her some air!" to the onlookers and fan her back to consciousness.  In seriousness, she seems to be doing well.

Many congratulations to Shane and Kenzie on their newborn Micah Shane...  I like the name!  I am also amazed at how quick he came.  We started getting the texts about her labor right before dinner and before I could put the last dish away afterwards he was born!  Kenzie is one tough cookie.  She went completely natural!  Just like I did with my vasectomy... (just threw that in for shock value, I am just jealous of her pain tolerance)  seriously though, my best to Shane and Kenz in their new world with two kids.  I am sure that you will do awesome.  I am also sure that in a couple years Cole with look at his brother as more than just another pet in the house.  Tracen dumped a piture of water on Tyler within the first 48 hours. 

I hope this email finds everything well with you and yours.  Sorry to hear that the Palmer family has been so ill this week.  Glad that you aren't closer during your sickness :)

Dan

Of falling off the roof, toddler profanity, BDV and lost molars(2)...

February 16, 2014

Yesterday I was in the zone.  I was a Saturday cleaning machine.  No dirty toilet, or soap scummed tub was safe.  The "honey-do" list was in danger of becoming completely extinct.  My children were both in shock, and awe of what they were witnessing.  That is, until it came to me taking down the Christmas lights...then I fell off the roof.  Literally.

Obviously I am not seriously injured and I didn't die so let's clear up any concern you might have there.  There were several missteps (no pun intended) along the way that caused this event.  I was in a hurry.  Being in a rush is a bad place to be when you are on a roof.  I was in slippers.  This is not roofer-approved footwear.  I was over confident.  Remember how I was saying I was in the zone?  I didn't have anyone holding the ladder.  It turns out this is a pretty good idea.  I had just completed taking down the last strand above the garage,  when I put my first (and last) solid foot on the ladder on my way down.  They ladder slipped off the roof like a slip and slide.  The last thing I remember, before hitting the ground, is grabbing for the gutter.  Apparently I was pretty movitvated to not die because you can see the bow in the gutter from my hands.  When I landed I remember wondering why Tracen, who was playing soccer right across the street wasn't rushing to my aid.  (as it turns out, his friends had said to him "Uh, Tracen, I think you Dad just fell off the roof" but when he inspected the roof and saw that I was no longer there he told them "no he didn't") I guess it didn't occur to him that when someone falls OFF the roof, they will no longer be found ON the roof.  I must have been in some shock because I remember laying there taking an injury inventory as Trev stood above me repeating over and over "Dad, you fell down."  I eventually crawled into the house and callled out to Deanne who checked me out.  I got off pretty lightly.  I have whiplash, a sprained thumb and foot, a scratched up leg from falling on the ladder and scratches on my wrists from my desparate gutter grab.  I am sure it could have been much worse.

Trev has an inadvertant potty mouth these days.  Trev cannot say the word "truck".  The TR becomes the F sound.  This has made for several funny/innappropriate occasions.  The other day he could not stop telling me about his "fire TRuckers" pajamas.  I nearly choke on my mirth when he does this.  Also, the other day as we were having a rare quiet moment in the car with the boys, he took the opportunity to tell me about the two "TRuckers" he saw driving along side of us.  You can only imagine the horror I felt a few Sundays ago when he found a toy "TRuck" in between the aisles... it's fun to have the entire ward hear about the toy "TRuck' he likes to play with.  I have started to become a bit desensitized to the F-word because of the boy.  The funny thing is, he has no problem saying "Trev".  Just "Truck".

In the past I have really hated Valentines day.  I mean, I really really couldn't stand it.  I am certain that I have produced some pretty lousy attempts at the holiday as a result of my distain.  This year, I decided that I could celebrate Valentines day in my own way.  I renamed myself "Big Daddy Valentine" (BDV), doled out the cheesy Valentines day cards, bought flowers BEFORE the holiday, and called Deanne from work multiple times in my "Barry White" voice.  I also dubbed myself the "Freight Train of Luv" and would leave notes around the house with the nothing but the words "Choo...Choo" on them.  I guess I was a bit too loving since Tate would really flip out each time he caught me kissing on Dee.  He told us that it really grosses him out and that if we kept it up he was leaving.  The promise of that threat makes me want to never stop kissing her.  All in all, the actions of the week made for a much more enjoyable experience for me.  On the actual day, Dee and I went to the temple while Tracen babysat.  Now that was a holiday!  I guess if you just go with the flow and make it a bit cheesy, it can be a fun. Not the temple... the holiday I mean.

Tracen had a week of firsts.  He rejected his first would-be girlfriend and he landed his first babysitting gig.  A girl in his class wrote him a note asking him if he would like to go with her...  he said that he laughed and told her out loud "no thanks!" at which point I guess that she said "Fine, be that way".  He asked me what "going" with someone meant.  I told him everyhing I remembered about my 6th grade romance.  I told him that when I "went" with Becky Peterson, that it meant I would look at her from a distance, get sick at the thought of talking to her, write her the occasional stupid note, and have my heart broken every time she so much as looked at another boy.  Tracen said that sounded pretty lame.  I told him I agreed.  His babysiting was much more successful however.  He made money, proved himself responsible, and earned the praise of the parents of the family he tended.  He is a really responsible 10 year old.  Tracen lost a molar, but decided he didn't believe in the Tooth Fairy anymore and didn't want to put the tooth under his pillow not for any amount of money.  We were not about to confess anything and therefore did our best to convince him.  His response, "Mom, come on...don't make this akward!"  The Tooth Fairies response,

Tyler also lost a molar this week. He actually allowed me to help him extract it.  He stood in my bathroom while I pulled, pushed and yanked on the tooth.  Every time I heard the little cracking of the tooth pulling away from the gum, I would cringe.  I swear I was more of a ninny about it than the boy.  Eventually, as all teeth do, it came out.  He was stoked about how rich he was going to get from the TF for the molar.  I guess the going rate for molars is at least twice that of incisors.  The TF struggles around our house though.  She is a slouch.  She often forgets to leave $ on the first night, and more often than not she leaves $ but forgets to take the tooth.  Tyler has had his tooth sleeping with him for the last several night in hopes that she will return and get it from him. Maybe if he keeps believing....he will finally recieve!

Well it's time.  Time for me to help Dee cook the meatloaf.  Time for me to rest my weary sprained thumb.  Have a great week everyone.

Dan and Dee

Midnight Snowshoes

This weekend I went with Kris and Kwint Kemp to their cabin in the Uintah's.  We had to snowshoe in dig out from the recent storms.  I had a really good time cross-country skiing, shooting Kris's arsenal of guns he has been collecting, and taking a midnight, moonlit, round-trip snowshoe hike up to a nearby lake (5 miles round trip).  When we got up the next morning, it had snowed over a foot of fresh powder which required us to dig each of the vehicles out.  We have been doing this little guys night for the last 4 years and I really look forward to it each year.  In the next couple of years, we will start bringing up our sons.

Tracen had another tough sports weekend, but I can tell that he is really enjoying playing and he is dedicated on improving his skill and fitness level.  He and Dee have been taking this squat and pushup challenge over the last several days.  It reminds me of when I was in sixth grade and started to really take physical fitness seriously.  I remember doing tons of pushups and situps every night.  Truth be told, some of the impetus for my exercising was to thwart genetics.  I wanted to do everything in my power to combat against inheriting the dreaded "Jacobs Pecs".  I think that I was partially successful.

Trev is unpredictable as always.  This week in a moment of love, he said "Dad is like my best friend".  My heart warmed.  I quickly asked him why I was, like, his best friend and he promptly told me, "I'm not yours friend.  I'm NOT!"  He has discovered what our other children already know... I am not funny.  He has told me multiple times this week "...Top it Dad.  Yours is not funny".  Whereas I might not be funny, I find his telling me this hilarious.  The other thing I find funny is when he declares that he doesn't need to use the bathroom.  This comment means that he is on the verge of wetting his pants.  Or the bathroom floor.  Or both.

So I had a biometrics screening last week.  Everything panned out ok, except for the part when in came to my BMI (body mass index).  I was told that I was in the "obese" category.  In fact, I was only 2 points away from being morbidly so.  It looks like I may need to cut back on our weekly Krispy Kreme outings.

Tyler and Tracen are working on their Thomas S. Monson scouting award.  It is an award that they will only offer until March and it will never be offered again.  One of the requirements is to learn the 13th article of faith.  We printed it, framed it, and placed it on our countertop.  Tracen taught it to himself over a plate of quesadillas one night.  I was wondering why he kept looking up and then staring off into space.  Tyler surprised us both by a couple of mornings later cling down and reciting it perfectly at breakfast time.  I guess he had had a bad dream and had read it to himself "about 50 times" to help him get his mind off of the dream.  It looks like they will both receive the award at the upcoming blue and gold banquet.

We are loving early out church.  It is nice to spend more time in the afternoon together.  I know that Dee likes getting all of her meetings done earlier.

Have a nice week.  

Dan

Bean Bag Champ

February 4, 2014

I have so very little material of which I can brag about myself.  I am mediocre at just about everything I do.  My most distinguishing trait is also one that I am a little embarrassed to share (I have a superflous nipple) so when I can actually find bragging rights to something, I had best talk myself up while I am at the top of my game.  I excell at the game of "Cornhole".   While I absolutely loathe the name of the game, it would appear that I dominate at it as evidenced by my utter domination of the Stratford clan last Friday.  Just so there is no mistake here, the game consists of standing at about a 20ft distance and pitching bean bags onto a board that is on an incline.  There is a small hole cut on the board and if your beanbag goes through the hole, you get points, if  your bag slightly overlaps the hole, you get points.  If your bag remains on the board, you get points.  Well I got more points (with a little help from Dee) and I am the current champion of the game.  All Hail "Cornholius" (as I have just now named myself)!  Thanks to the Stratfords for a fun filled Friday evening.  And extra thanks to Tracen who babysat for 5 hours without killing off any of his siblings.

We semi-watched the Super-fiasco on Sunday at Mom and Dad's house.  There was nothing semi about the sheer number of calories consumed however.  The two who were most interested in the game, and who subsequently talked the most trash, were Sammy and Tracen.  I was the only Bronco supporter in the house and I am just glad that I didn't give more of a hoot than I did.  I still bet (and lost) a quarter to Sammy over the whole thing.  If Sammy becomes a "bookie" it was his Uncle Dan that gave him a start down that path.

Tracen has really taken a shine to football over the last 3 weeks as he is currently a football card collector / trader / swindler.  He constatly pumps me for information on former and current players.  My knowledge of professional football has been stretched to the breaking point.  I find that I don't really care if Joe Montana or Aaron Rodgers is a better quarterback.  I am just goiing to tell him that Steve Young was the best player of all time from here on out and that pretty much every other player before or since him stinks and that they aren't worth collecting.

Being the first man of the ward, I have found that when I come home to a major food production, when the whole house smells divine, and when it would appear to be a mini-thanksgving in the making... that it's not for me.  There have actually been a couple of times when all that is left of what smells to have been a phenomenal meal, is just that... a smell.  Some lucky family got the meal hook-up tonight!  That lucky family would not be the Jacobs (actually that is not true, we did get some of the "reject" rolls).

Deanne and I have decided that the terrible two's have nothing up on the 3's.  Trev has mutiple personalities.  It isn't this fact alone that scares me, it is how quickly he can morph from one to the other.  Nobody should be allowed to switch from demon to angel and back to devil's spawn as rapidly as he does.  Even though it can be challenging, I am really enjoying him at this stage, half of the time.

We have a full week of scouts, basketball, soccer practice, piano, homework and Relief Society (just Dee) on tap.  I was glad to be able to squeeze in a line or two.  I hope to give a better effort this next week.  Ta Ta for now!

Dan

Bean Bag Champ....In My Defense

While I was away at my presidency meeting last night, Dan had time to sit down and write this lovely family email.  While I am truly grateful that he writes these emails as a little record for our family, I feel the need to make a few corrections in my defense.  Hmm...where to begin....how about " Mr. Bean Bag Champ" and " All Hail Cornholius" and may I quote...."with a little help from Dee"?  Really? 

 My dearest Daniel, may I remind you that you are nothing without me.  It is simply impossible for you to win this game, any game, without me.  What ever happened to "Co-Winners"?  Isn't that what you are always begging for when I win and you lose?  Ponder that my love.  Now onto the you "being the first man of the ward... and coming home to a major food production, when the whole house smells divine, and when it would appear to be a mini-thanksgving in the making"... that it's not for you?  That has only happend ONE TIME!  And that was because it was a last minute need and I only had enough ingredients for one meal, so the other family got our dinner.  Cut me some slack....our Pizza dinner was tasty that night too! So...while this meal was also a last minute need, I made double everything!!  It took me a total of 4 hours slaving in the kitchen.....making it all from scratch...and you enjoyed every last bite....NOT just a few "reject rolls".  

So my dear, while you may think you have very little to brag about, I happen to think you are AMAZING!! Just don't forget who has your back!  We will always be "Co-Winners"!

Love you, 

Dee

Thanks for reading....I feel so much better!

World's Best Corn-Dogs make "my hangry"

All,

No, you did not read my title line incorrectly.  It is a mash up of several different happenings over this last week.  Let me explain, no that will take too long, let me sum up.

Trev, up until very recently would scold us when we were doing something that he didn't like with the words " ...stop (insert behavior he finds annoying), that makes my hangry."  Of course his cute request only increased the actions he thought were annoying just so his brothers, and maybe sometimes his father, could hear him say that over and over again. Now being hangry is nothing to mess around with.  I get there nearly every day right before lunch.  Which brings me to the next portion of my title: corndogs.

At work there has been a flyer posted on nearly every wall advertising that the "World's best Corndog" truck would be paying us a visit.  Oh how that flyer was mocked.  By me.  By my coworkers.  Many of us feigned mock excitement and there was even one person who created a "countdown" chain for this lunch event.  Well, I was the first person to see the truck arrive, and during a moment of extreme "hangryness" may or may not have been the first person in line for the world's best corndog.  I may or may not have consumed that nearly foot long hotdog battered and fried to celestial perfection.  I may or may not have kicked off a frenzy in my office that resulted in the corndog truck running out of product long before the time they were slotted to leave.  I most certainly paid a very high gastro-intestinal price.  As it turns out, the World's best Corndog, produces the World's worst gas.  Who would have thunk it?

Corndogs have a double meaning our home.  There is the food version, which as has been mentioned, can be a culinary delight, and then there is the kind that has now earned a ban in our household.  I don't know when the word "corndog" took on the meaning of kneeing your brother in the behind, but around here that is its most popular definition.  Well Tracen took it upon himself to use this action every time his brothers, in his words "make my hangry".  He was doling out this punishment by the baker's dozen.  So coincidentally, (or was it?) the very week I consumed the world's best corndog, I also banned all corndogs from my house.  Because, indeed, corndogs were beginning to make my hangry!

We took the boys skiing this week.  The slopes were busy and the cost was astronomical but the skiing was fun.  Tate has mastered the art of bombing the bunny hill.  I tried really hard to get him to turn now and again, but he told me his legs wouldn't obey his mind.  He was popping out of his skis pretty easy, so I thought I knew how to remedy that problem.  After a particularly frustrating bit where he couldn't get back into his skis, and he was whining pretty good about it, I went over and started whacking the bottom of his boot with my pole to get the snow off of them.  I guess I was over-zealous to get the snow off, missed his boot and whacked him pretty hard up the side of his head.  Though it was an accident, I did see an immediate improvement in his attitude and he no longer asked me to help him get his skis on.  

The boys are getting stir crazy.  The weather, though not so bad, has left ice all over the yard making it impossible to play outside for any length of time.  We have had our fill of screen time that's for sure and I am getting really tired of hearing them tell me that there is nothing to do.  We have begun to tell them that this particular phrase will earn them plenty of chores to do.

Tracen and Tyler got served a little humble pie in the sports category this week.  I don't really care if my kids are the best on their team or really what their skill level is, the only thing I could really hope for is that they give it their all and that the enjoy themselves.  Apparently, at least for Tracen, having fun and winning are so closely related that it is hard to have one without the other.  On the way home from his soccer thumping, I gave him some fatherly advice that I am sure was not very well-received at the moment it was delivered.  That's ok.  I am sure that he will either appreciate it in the years to come, or pay it forward to his son.

So, happy birthday last week to Rebecca, my niece on a mission, and Janelle my mom-in-law this week.  We hope to hear from you soon.

Dan

Early Morning Pork

January 19, 2014

Today I woke up at 5 am, not unusual, but I was extra excited to do so as  I knew it was my free day (the one day a week I allow myself to eat treats) and I had a hot date with a box of Krispy Kreme donuts that I had squirrled away the day before in the pantry.  30 seconds and 3 donuts later, I settled in to getting everything ready for our Sunday.  I got a pork roast in the crockpot, made the sauce for the roast, made some cinnamon rolls (Pillsbury), emptied the garbages, emptied the dishwasher, put out a plate and donut for Dee, told her to hurry up about 20 times, forced her to eat said donut before she left for her 7:00 am meeting (to keep me from eating it), and got all the boys curch clothes out... all before 6:50 am.  I was in the groove!  I think that I will get a box of donuts at the ready for every Sunday from here on out.  

We celebrated Mom and Dad's brithdays this month by going to Sizzler, Dad's choice.  Though the company was good, the service was laughable and the food was tolerable.  Had it not been the quality of those in our party, I would have chalked the meal up as a mini-disaster.  Tracen and Sammy watched the herd at Bruce and Christy's house and we were pleasantly surprised that everything was intact and that no major fights had broken out while we were gone.  I think that we might finally be getting to the stage where we can comfortably leave our children without paying for a babysitter.  Oh, how I have longed for these days.

Sherman  (Dee's grandfather) gave us a bit of a scare this week, but today when I got him up, he appeared to be both in good spirits and clearer in his mind than earlier in the week.  That man is a fighter.  I am impressed by his resilience and attitude for the hand he has been dealt.  As he likes to put it though, "At least I didn't have to push a handcart and sleep outside in the cold."  I would say that those things might be the only physical hardships he has not had to endure. 

Tracen and Tyler both had 2 games of b-ball this week and both of them played very well.  Dee took Tate skiing for a half day and he did very well aslo.  We had a pack meeting where Tracen and Tyler both earned several awards.  Tomorrow, we are planning taking the boys skiing again for at least a half day.  It should be fun, though I wish the snow were better.

It looks like Mom and Dad will start to move later on this week.  Dad has promised that he will let me and the boys help them do so (thanks Dad).  As mentioned before, it will sure be nice to go over to his place to watch BYU games with him only being 10 minutes away.  We look forward to having you so close.

I hope this email finds you all well.  For the record, I wish all of you January birthdays (like 50 family members) a very Happy Birthday, in particular my Dad, and Becca who have had, or will have them in the next couple of days.

Love,

Dan

Midnight Hack

January 12, 2014

All,

The middle of this week Tate had a resurgence of a cough that seems to have been lingering with him to varying degrees for the past couple of months.  He flung himself on our bed sometime close to midnight complaining of his ailment and coughing up a storm.  Tate has always had a very distinct cough.  Even when he was an infant a couple of weeks old, he got this cough that would leave him gagging when he really gets it going.  Nothing has changed.  I volunteered to come downstairs with him to provide what little comfort I could.  I got him a drink of water, gave him some homeopathic "snake oil" (ingredients: dark honey, stew nettle, linamint, and balm of Gilead) and made him as comfy as I could on the couch next to our fireplace.

I sat there in a stupor and felt bad for him as he had a particularly bad coughing fit and wondered what in the world could be done.  I ended up asking him if he would like me to say a prayer for him, which he agreed to let me do.  It was a simple and sincere prayer but when it was done, I felt like there was more to be said.  I wanted to make sure that I wasn't praying for his comfort just so I could get back to sleep (though truth be told that was my initial motivation) so I prayed again, this time silently.  Instead of asking for much, other than that I could make him as comfortable as possible, I thanked God for the time I had to spend with Tate.  I thanked HIm that I got to be his parent and that I had the opportunity to help him.  I thanked him for the love I felt for my son.  It was surprising to me how I felt at that moment.  I truly felt glad.  Not that I was awake.  Not that my son was sick, but that I was able to be there for him.  I felt love for this miserable little man and at that time I was happy to be by his side in the middle of the night when he needed me.  Blessedly, he was able to fall asleep pretty quickly and both of us slept well the remainder of the night.

The rest of our kids have had similar ailments this week, but most of them now are on the mend and thankfully, Dee and I seemed to have dodged the bullet thus far.  Knocking on wood over here.  Actually, it's a laminate countertop.  I hope that is adequate enough to ensure good Karma.

Trev hates his pants.  I don't know why.  I don't remember having any ill feelings for my trousers when I was a lad, but he really gets mad at his.  Today after Church his carpenter pants really did something to tick him off.  He tore at them in a fury until they were off and in his hands and then he proceeded to pummel his pants rotten.  After their beating he threw them across the room.  I am not sure what he was saying.  I can still only understand about 75% of what comes out of his mouth anyway, but when his knickers anger him he becomes unintelligible.  In his rage his underwear worked down around his ankles and he tripped on them.  That seemed to snap him out of his moment.   

We drove up to see Mom and Dad Jacobs today to wish her a very late happy birthday.  They are mostly packed up and ready for their upcoming move.  We are very much so going to look forward to having them closer than they are currently.  They did off-load one of their paintings they had from when they lived in Italy the first time and they did say (FOR THE RECORD) that we could call dibs on the Rose Painting should they not find a place for it in their new home...  they also let me take Leah's painting of the chickens she did while she was in high school.  I think it was for me anyway, since I have an affinity for that type of bird, but if not, Leah, you are welcome to have it back.

As mentioned, Tracen and Tyler are playing basketball, but in addition to that, Tracen is playing "Futsal".  It is a form of indoor soccer.  For those of you who have never had a chance to see Tracen play, while he is not the speediest of players, his foot-skills are very developed and he is really fun to watch.  Tyler is playing very well in baskeball this year and if he were any sort of aggressive, he would really be a force.  It just isn't his style to be so, unless it it towards Tate or Tracen.

Well the boys are doing their best to injure each other in the family room and I am starting to feel like I either need to referee or jump in and remind them all who really is Alpha Male still in these parts.  I should be able to hold that title for at least the next 3 years... I hope.  Oh man, there went a picture!  Sorry, this party is officially over.  Time to be Big Bad Dad...

Love,

Dan

Remember When...

January 5, 2014

Hello Family,

Once upon a moon... many, many moons ago, the DanDee family used to send a periodic email.  To say we have fallen out of the habit would be a gross understatment to be sure, but we have decided that we would attempt to rekindle that habit again this year. Lucky you!  Unless you find this bit of news to be unlucky; I can't say that I blame you if those are your sentiments. Since I, this is Dan, seem to be the self-appointed spokesperson of this family, I will probably be the one to write this to you more often than not. 

So the holiday season has mercifully passed.  I say mercifully since I can truly echo the feelings of the Christmas tune "..and Mom and Dad can hardly wait for school to start again..."  It isn't that we haven't had a great holiday season, our Christmas indeed Merry and bright (and white) but there is only so much Christmas ballyhoo one can ingest before indigestion sets in.  We were very happy to have spent time with many of you over the holiday season though.  It was nice to spend time with those who are dear to us (if not near).

We had a nice New Years eve by staying at home with just us this year.  We had Beer Rocks (pizza rolls) with Root Beer floats and Tracen's favorite kind of salad... iceberg lettuce.  Iceberg lettuce salad, if drowned in ranch dressing is palatable, but I must say that I have definately become a bit of a salad snob.  Give me kale!  Give  me spinach!  Give me lechuga! (actually that means lettuce in Spanish but I was clean out of names for the other leafy greens).  Thes rest of our evening was spent by our boys besting me at video games (curse you Mario Cart) and us watching "Ghost Busters" on Netflix (that movie is nearly 30 years old!).  When the appointed hour hit, everyone that was still awake (all but Trev) went outside on the front porch and made a racket.  The kids and Dee had their home-made noise makers going while I sang "Auld Lang Syne" at the top of my lungs.  FIrst of all, the top of my lungs is a lung or two above the top of most other people's lungs and secondly, I really only sang the first 6 words to the song and then screeched the tune for the rest.  Nobody really knows the words to the song anyway... I swear it is written in a different language anyhow.  I am sure that our drowsy neighbors appreciated the Jacobs band, and if they didn't, well then they are welcome to put their houses up for sale.

Deanne is nearly into her 4th year of being the RS President of our ward.  As I am sure you can imagine, she does a wonderful job.  Deanne is naturally warm, kind and caring.  I so often see her furiuosly texting with a sister in the ward dealing with some very real and heavy topics.  Being the first man of the ward (self imposed title of the RS Pres's husband) has its drawbacks for sure, but the one that is the hardest is seeing Deanne's heart get broken by the struggles of the Sisters in our ward.  The calling isn't all about that though, Deanne is so very often visiting others, having meetings or praying for the well-being of her beloved sisters.  She seems to enjoy it.

My calling of Ward Choir director turned out being more enjoyable than I expected it to.  I am no Mack Wilberg (Max?) but I put together a program of several songs that I condcucted, a narrative that was only mostly plagarized, and a couple of musical numbers that seemed to go very well.  It was gratifying to see it all come together and that at least a few people seemed to be touched by the message and music.  I have new-found respect for conductors everywhere.  Hopefully I didn't have too much of that goofy conductor booty-bounce going on while I was leading the choir.  I am not that advanced of a director yet.

Tracen and Tyler are both playing basketball and enjoying it.  I am enjoying watching them even if most games end up with baseball worthy scoring totals.  Tracen's game on Saturday had the robust score of 9-7...  He did nearly foul out in the first 5 minutes which made that period of his play rather interesting.  He really is a chip off of the old block in that regard.  I would bet, however, that Tyler will be taller than Tracen, and if he chooses to pursue B-ball that might stand him in good stead. 

Trev and Tate mostly stay home and enjoy/annoy each other.  Trev got a foam padded Thor's hammer for Christmas which is quickly becoming a WMD around here.  In fact,  I was innocently walking down the stairs today when Thor's hammer bounced off of my dome.  When I turned around to see who my attacker was, they were gone...  Did the hammer act of its own accord?? I think NOT!  

I can see that this email is becoming quite lengthy.  Before I sign off I would like to wish my Mother a very Happy Birthday (on the 1st) and my niece a warm congrats on her recent marriage to Spencer Fogelman in the Sacramento Temple.  We were sorry that we were unable to be around for either of those events.

Love to all,

Dan